Twas the Night Before Christmas - Hoonigan Style

'Twas the Night before Christmas---Hoonigan Style

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the shops

Not a creature was stirring, not even old Pops;

The mufflers were sitting by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would hoon there;

The children were nestled all snug in their Vette beds,

while visions of super cars drifted in their heads;

And mamma in her leathers, and I in my T,

had just returned home from a winter hooning spree,

When out on the street there arose such a cloud,

I sprang from the bed to see what was so loud.

Away to the window I ran like The Flash,

Ripped open the window to see if he'd crash.

When, what to my wondering eyes did I see,

But a fat little man, in a Shelby GT,

Now that old driver was so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.

Well 650 + horse power he had to tame,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called it some names;

"Now, light up those tires you spicy young Vixen!

Traction control off cause these tires we're Blitzen!"

As he hooned around trees I thought "that thing can fly,"

His driving finesse you just can't deny,

So house to house, man he just flew,

Delivering car parts and tires to the hooners that were true.

As I ran to the shop to see him come round,

Through the man-door he crept without making a sound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to lead foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with gasoline and soot;

A bundle of goodies he had slung on his back,

I could only hope that one was my Tach.

He had a hot rodders face and a racer's beer belly,

I thought for a moment he had swallowed a Pirelli

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old hooner,

My only wish was that I could have met him sooner;

A wink of his eye and a nod of his head,

Let me know that I got some new tire tread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to the bench,

And laid out new tools; and finished off with a wrench,

He sprang to his Shelby, as he hit the gas hard I heard the supercharger whistle,

And away he launched as though in a missile

But I heard him exclaim, as he hooned out of sight,

"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a Good-Night."

2013 Ford Taurus SHO & 2013 Ford Flex

 2013 Ford Taurus SHO & 2013 Ford Flex

what car fits your needs best?

a very classy sedan indeed

Let’s just say WOW to both of these great vehicles. The Taurus SHO was able to capture my eye with its aggressive styling while the Flex impressed me with its un-natural road handling characteristics and performance.

there is no denying this is not a minivan

 

look at this

That being said I found the Flex very underwhelming in the looks department...it bears so many similarities to the late 80's Ford F-150's with a canopy option, that I can't bring myself to see anything else.

 

now look at this

What I can say about the Flex is that when I was selling cars people would ask me for them specifically, if they had one they wanted another, if their friends had one they wanted one for themselves...it seems to be a replacement for the minivan! It's totally understandable when you consider that this is still a seven passenger vehicle with the ability to swallow a baby hippo in the back, and what’s really impressive is that if you don't have any wasted space with the tops being angled in...It’s virtually a squared opening back there. Someone thought that out quite well.

 
Now the Taurus SHO...that was different story. I have had my eye on one of these for a while and to actually get up close and personal with it...well let’s just say we shared some good times.

 

Taurus SHO is such a prtty girl

This car looks so striking to me. I'm not sure if it was the high belt line or the huge 20" wheels, or even that appealing front fascia...but it all worked well together. The SHO package totally changes the dynamics of this car though, in a world where most performance packages consist of stickers and wheels, Ford nailed it with this one. They have added a massive set of brakes to slow you down after the incredible acceleration this 3.5l ecoboost engine will show you. As if that’s not enough, this car has a great new technology they call Torque Vectoring and a specially calibrated power assisted steering, and a true off setting for stability control (not recommended for the faint of heart). The SHO package delivers!

 
So two very different cars for very different buyers...but are they really that different? They both have the hugely impressive 365HP 3.5l ecoboost engine backed by 6 speed automatic transmissions. Both are AWD and both are wonderful performers, both are intended for family usage and both are in huge demand!



look at the headroom in the Flex

 That’s right, the Flex has some of the same capability as the SHO, but it looks much less intimidating. Rest assured though, that when you have it loaded with six passengers and you stab the throttle you will ignite a symphony of surprised screams and when you toss it into corners they will shriek sweet nothings in your ear. Don’t let its looks fool you, this car has the agility of a scared cat.

 

Taurus trunk is huge

With the Taurus you get all of the swinging room you could want in this full size beauty. Loads of adjustment in the seats lots of leg room in the back seat and a trunk that you could utilise for hauling a cord of wood home for your fireplace.

 

Let’s just say that if you are in the market for a very sporty sedan than the Taurus SHO should be high on your list to look into, if on the other hand you are wanting something very practical looking that doesn't feel practical at all when you’re driving, then the Flex is your ride.

 

SHO Interior

They both serve a purpose and they also share the same techy gadgetry...it will both amuse and confuse. The latest MyFordTouch system is both simple and complex...it takes some learning and then it becomes almost natural...like getting a new phone...first day you play the rest of the time you just show off. They also had adaptive cruise control which is quite nice when on the highway, you don't need to worry about coming up on slower traffic and having to hit the brakes, instead it will keep you a chosen distance behind and when you get the chance you change lanes and resume your speed without touching anything. Both had great sunroofs, but the sky view you get in the Flex was amazing. Park assist feature was there and keyless entry for both.

 

 Ford has done great things with both of these cars, they seem to be on fire with what consumers are wanting these days!





Cars were provided by Ford of Canada